Blog of R'kik D'nec

First of all, I hope everybody is having a good Christmas. I am, for the most part. My time off seems to be flying by without accomplishing anything. All the days are blending into one another, and I'm spending at least half of my time sleeping. It seems like the new semester will be upon us before we know it. I'm a bit anxious about this coming semester. As I've said before, I should be pretty busy. I'm excited about everything I'm committed to, and I guess I'm just worried that I won't be able to devote as much time to everything as I wish I could. Too much of a good thing perhaps? I know that once I get back though, that things will fall into place and everything will work out OK. Right now, though, I'm concerned about my parents. My mom hasn't been doing well and my dad is burnt out from everything he has to do with work and taking care of my mom at the same time. It's made for a bit of a tense atmosphere at home. Pray for them if you get a chance. I hope everyone else is having a blessed Christmas, Boxing Day, New Year's, etc...

By the way, I have a cell phone now...just ask me if you want the number.

Current Mood: Good
Currently listening to: The Guest by Phantom Planet
Last movie I saw: Punch Drunk Love
One line review: Very interesting style, didn't make sense while at the same time was fairly easy to follow.
On a scale of 0-5 sucks (0 being the best): 2.0 sucks

It's all over now. Monday I stayed up until 6:30AM writing one paper. Tuesday I stayed up until 3:30 writing another. Wednesday I had a final exam and had to present my Senior project. This morning I had my last final. It feels good not to have anything to do. I guess I'm going home sometime Saturday or Sunday. Right now I just feel empty. I'd like to celebrate but I don't have the energy for it. I feel like there's something missing. I always get reflective at the end of a semester, and this year is no different. This semester's been an interesting one. There's definitely been a rollercoaster of events, but I think in the end I'm better off than I started. Everything happens for a reason, right? It turned out to be another good semester academically, even if I didn't really like all my classes. In other areas, I guess there were just two major disappointments. Even so, I've been handling them better than I ever thought I could. Either that or I'm deluding myself. Like I said last time, I'm a little anxious about heading home over Christmas. I'm not going to work, and it doesn't look like I'll be going to NYC, because my parents want me to visit my grandparents and my brother's cheap. I have no idea what I'm going to do with all my time. It'll either be really nice or I'll be miserable. I hope it's not too awkward. I got an email today telling me that I got the TA position for engineering 145 next semester, so I'm excited about that. In general, I'm looking forward to my last semester of college. My classes seem like they'll be challenging, and I really hope that I'll be able to stick with the film analysis class. At the same time, I'm going to have to look for some sort of job. It's hard to believe that college is almost over already. These 3.5 years have just flown by. I almost wish that I could do it over again. I think I could do better. Saying that though, I think the reason I'd do better is because of all the learning experiences I've had this time around. It's a shame that nobody can get things right on the first try, and you never get a second chance. It's like saying that, by definition, life is one big series of mistakes. Not very inspiring, I know, but it is in a way. It should give you some comfort to know that everyone is stumbling around life just as clueless as you are. I don't really know what I'm saying. It should be an inspiring thing though. If you live and learn and improve, then every day should be better than the last, and there's always hope. Hope is what keeps the world going around. Here's to hope...

Current Mood: Burnt out
Currently listening to: The Hour of Bewilderbeast by Badly Drawn Boy and The Last Broadcast by The Doves
Last movie I saw: The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
One line review: Very strange, funny, and better than I expected.
On a scale of 0-5 sucks (0 being the best): 2.0 sucks

Another Saturday night, another night of sitting in my room getting brainwashed by lyrics. It's actually pretty startling how easy your way of thinking can be manipulated. I think that people have a need to relate. They hear some lyrics, or see a situation in a movie or on TV, and they'll twist and distort it until it matches their life. I know I do it all the time. Honestly, I think that's why horoscopes aren't put out of business. Anyway, here's a rundown of my current life:

Thanksgiving was decent...my mom made me get a haircut:-/
The Muse concert with my brother was awesome
This week has flown by, and things are going to be super busy until Thursday
I had an interview to be a TA for Engineering 145
I signed up for "Literature in Film" for next semester
Last night was crazy...it was nice to spend some time with my suitemates who I really haven't hung out with that much and who are leaving next semester

Being home was once again a "mixed feelings" kind of situation, to use the language of course evaluations. ('tis the season) My brother was out all the time hanging out with his friends, and it reminded me that I really don't have any friends at home. Basically, I decided that I have no reason to go back to Batavia ever. (other than seeing my parents occasionally) It's made me a bit worried about Christmas break actually. I don't think that I want to work, but I'm afraid that I'll just get depressed hanging out at home the whole time. My brother suggested we take a trip, and so now I'm looking into going to NYC either for New Year's or some other time over Christmas. There's tons of stuff to do, and I'd especially like to visit a few museums. It looks like I'm going to be a TA for ENGR 145 next semester, assuming nothing terrible happens. That'll be kinda fun and the money will be nice. On a whim I registered for a 6th class for next semester. I wanted to take "Understanding Movies" but it was filled up, so I decided to sign up for "Literature in Film" instead. It's an English class with an 8 person limit, and it looks like there's a scheduled viewing time every Tuesday night. I don't know if I'm going to keep the class, but it should be interesting to check out. Speaking of movies, I saw a delightful little film tonight. Coffee and Cigarettes was quite interesting. It was a series of 11 seemingly unrelated scenes of people having, well...coffee and cigarettes. What was cool about it though was how everything sort of tied together. If I remember correctly, there was a checkerboard in every scene, and a bunch of lines of dialog were repeated. Some of the scenes were serious, some were funny, but they were all intriguing. The acting was also superb, and it really conveyed the awkward tension of these everyday meetings. Lately I've been realizing that I haven't really spent that much time with my suitemates this semester. I kind of regret it now, especially since a bunch of them are leaving next semester. Last night and tonight I got to hang out with everyone for awhile, and I really enjoyed it. Who knows if I'll have any free time until Thursday. I've got to do my huge flight and orbital project and study for the final in that class, not to mention I have to get my senior project done, write a paper on it and present it, all by Wednesday. Next semester looks like it'll be busy too, especially if everything falls into place and I end up taking 6 classes, TA-ing, and being a IV leader. I'm looking forward to graduation, even though I'm still not sure what I'm going to be doing. I had a good conversation with Alex, my senior project grad student advisor last night about that sort of stuff. I guess you could say that I'm more willing to get a "real" job, knowing that it can be a temporary thing. I don't know though, I still want to look into some of my other really cool but not as practical options. After Thanksgiving though, I've pretty much decided that it's California or bust. Then again, only God knows where I'll end up. Take care everyone, hopefully I'll catch you sometime before I head home next weekend.


Current Mood: Good, but busy
Currently listening to: A Rush of Blood to the Head by Coldplay
Last movie I saw: Coffee and Cigarettes
One line review: Very entertaining, good acting, I liked how it all tied together.
On a scale of 0-5 sucks (0 being the best): 1.0 sucks