Sunday, April 18, 2004
Throwing in the towel
Interviewer to The Beatles (upon arriving in America): "When are you going to cut your hair?"
Beatle (not sure which one): "I just got it cut (laugh)"
"Everyone's gotta be something, me I'm garbage. It's all I ever wanted to be. Shock me again and I'll say anything you want me to." -Matthew Good Band, Rico
It is so nice out today. This past weekend has been great as far as the weather was concerned, actually. I leave for Houston on Tuesday, which I'm really excited about. Also, tomorrow night I'm going to an Indians game with some other NASA co-ops which should be fun. Then on Friday is the (hopefully good) A Perfect Circle concert which I've been looking forward to. Eve6 was a bit of a disappointment, but not really. It was about what I expected, and I expected it to be mediocre. So that's the events of my life, both past and upcoming, in a nutshell. Now on to the usual....
I realized a couple of things last night. One is that there comes a time, from time to time, when you just need to surrender to the painfully obvious. It's a bit depressing, but more than anything else it usually just pisses me off. Then you move on and hopefully learn something. I've learned. It's like I was talking about in the previous post...you learn and you change, and I have changed. Another thing is that, like I was discussing with Chung, I crave novelty. Instead of calling it ADD, I'd rather think that it is the normal state of an active and brilliant mind, always seeking the next excitation. I never read a book twice, and I rarely watch movies more than once. The thing for me is, once I see something I find it boring to go through it again, because I already know what's going to happen. I like the idea of starting over. All through high school, I couldn't wait for college and the chance to start over with a new group of people and reinvent myself. That lasted about 2 weeks once I got to Case. Now I'm looking at graduate school with the same anticipation; the chance to start over in a new place. I'm not even sure if grad school is right for me, but it does have a certain appeal. The final thing is, I realized that, at least in my mind, I tend to come off as creepy or at least snobbish. I don't really know why, and I don't even know if other people see me in that way, but it bothers me. I really don't think I am, at least once you get to know me. It's those first impressions though that kill you.
I doubt anyone knows what I'm talking about. It was just one of those little moments that get under your skin and bug you. I'm not going to let it anymore though. Like I said, you have to move on. Also, I'm not going to let Sparky bring me down at work anymore. I do enjoy my job (mostly), and I'm just going to start ignoring his nay-saying. Things are good, but they're just not what I thought they were. Oh well.
Beatle (not sure which one): "I just got it cut (laugh)"
"Everyone's gotta be something, me I'm garbage. It's all I ever wanted to be. Shock me again and I'll say anything you want me to." -Matthew Good Band, Rico
It is so nice out today. This past weekend has been great as far as the weather was concerned, actually. I leave for Houston on Tuesday, which I'm really excited about. Also, tomorrow night I'm going to an Indians game with some other NASA co-ops which should be fun. Then on Friday is the (hopefully good) A Perfect Circle concert which I've been looking forward to. Eve6 was a bit of a disappointment, but not really. It was about what I expected, and I expected it to be mediocre. So that's the events of my life, both past and upcoming, in a nutshell. Now on to the usual....
I realized a couple of things last night. One is that there comes a time, from time to time, when you just need to surrender to the painfully obvious. It's a bit depressing, but more than anything else it usually just pisses me off. Then you move on and hopefully learn something. I've learned. It's like I was talking about in the previous post...you learn and you change, and I have changed. Another thing is that, like I was discussing with Chung, I crave novelty. Instead of calling it ADD, I'd rather think that it is the normal state of an active and brilliant mind, always seeking the next excitation. I never read a book twice, and I rarely watch movies more than once. The thing for me is, once I see something I find it boring to go through it again, because I already know what's going to happen. I like the idea of starting over. All through high school, I couldn't wait for college and the chance to start over with a new group of people and reinvent myself. That lasted about 2 weeks once I got to Case. Now I'm looking at graduate school with the same anticipation; the chance to start over in a new place. I'm not even sure if grad school is right for me, but it does have a certain appeal. The final thing is, I realized that, at least in my mind, I tend to come off as creepy or at least snobbish. I don't really know why, and I don't even know if other people see me in that way, but it bothers me. I really don't think I am, at least once you get to know me. It's those first impressions though that kill you.
I doubt anyone knows what I'm talking about. It was just one of those little moments that get under your skin and bug you. I'm not going to let it anymore though. Like I said, you have to move on. Also, I'm not going to let Sparky bring me down at work anymore. I do enjoy my job (mostly), and I'm just going to start ignoring his nay-saying. Things are good, but they're just not what I thought they were. Oh well.
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